Escaping The Paradox
by CaptianPowdy
Summary: Some place, thing, Doctor-Who story I made that!


The Doctor was in the TARDIS (Time And Relative Dimensions In Space) singing to himself as he read a London newspaper from 1929,

"The Doctor's stuck in the Pandorica," The song starting in soto voce, "Amy might be dead and…" His voice now getting louder. "Rory's a roman with a gun inside his hand, looks like things aren't going as planned!"

A groaning sound echoed up from the TARDIS console, strangely similar to the noise it makes when the Doctor leaves the brakes on.

"Look," The Doctor said annoyed, " the song is by a band called Chameleon Circuit in a parallel universe, but… of course you wouldn't remember it because you thought it was silly and not even worth noting."

But the groan had not been a complaint, it had been a warning or a retch of distress. A large rumble echoed from the bowels of the Tardis. The Doctor jumped up ready for action, he ran to the console with a look of concern on his face as he examined one of the many screens fused into the console. This one in particular was showing a warning. The generator had stopped, the eon particles weren't being created and the TARDIS was crashing. The Time Lord looked down at the newspaper he was still holding and put it down on the worn chair he had been sitting on. Only to see it shooting off into one of the many corridors leading off the main console room a few seconds later.

Now the Doctor was terrified, and as he panicked and pushed various buttons and pulled various levers in vain, he found it harder to keep on standing on the floor. The crazed man grabbed a rail as he saw yet another warning appear. The gravitational field was failing and his sweaty hands left the rail just as what he had previously called down started rushing past him as he fell to what seemed like his death.

The Doctor woke up in the worst place possible, a corner! Well maybe that's a bit unfair, corners can't help that that's where they live, but nevertheless, the Doctor hated corners.

The Doctor stood. And after some climbing he reached his glove compartment and took out a grappling hook, using the same grappling hook from the same R.D.I.G.C.(Relative dimensions in glove compartments), the Doctor then made his way out of the impossibly infinite time machine. This was a little tricky as the Tardis was on its back like a giant blue box that's just crashed out of the time vortex.

The Doctor was in a place littered with junk. He thought he had been here before, but he couldn't quite remember where. But why a junk yard? Why would he of ever spent time in a junk yard? He could have been hiding, and besides he's ended up in stranger hiding places that he later randomly returned to for various reasons. In frustration the Jammy Dodger lover sat down for some deep thinking. The Doctor couldn't help imagining two people crouching behind this condensed muck he was sitting on. He couldn't help wondering why they were both staring at him. Then he noticed that in the strange scene, inside his head, he was a in another part of the dump. He looked towards where he imagined himself standing, "Hm." He grunted as he stared at a police box that looked very similar to how the Tardis looked soon after he first stole it. He turned around to look at the Tardis. He looked at the police box. Then an old man walked out of the police box completely ignoring the Doctor and put an old newspaper down on a rotting table and walked back into the police box. The Doctor groaned "Oh of all the places to crash, why did it have to be in front of myself."

The Doctor ran outside of the pile of clutter and realised that he had never known the name of this place, he turned to a sign that named the road with big bold letters. He started to read but only got to the first letter when he got bored and turned and almost walked into a policeman,

"Ah, Hello! Hello officer I was just wondering. What's the date?"

"Why, it's the 23rd of November." The police man said with a confused look on his face.

"Ok… what year?"

"Um, it's 1969." The police man was now very confused, earlier that day he had been attacked by a teleporting snake and now a strange man was asking him what year it was.

"Hmm…" The Doctor murmured. "Sounds familiar." With that he turned around and headed back to the Tardis.

The Doctor ran into the Tardis and started spinning. This was a normal event in the dimensional box but the Doctor knew it was ok since the Tardis didn't mind. This was the most fun he'd had in approximately 26 minutes. He shut he eyes tight and stopped spinning, he ran forward and hit his head on the door. "You're not the stairs!" The Doctor accused the door. He then turned 180 degrees to his left, then 90o to his right, looked at the coat stand and put on the top hat that looked the least like a giant shape-shifting mosquito-like creature. Then he went down the stairs leading towards the underneath of the console and opened the service hatch.

After fiddling with the disco lights that were controlled from the hatch. Our favourite time lord pulled the leaver titled "Emergency backup computer power!" He then rushed back to the main part of the console room and looked at a computer screen he had decorated with High School Musical stickers from a girls magazine made in 2008.

"Warning!" He read, "Eon particle generator unresponsive! Tardis immobilised!" He ignored the bleeping, red light and entered the data banks. Typing ferociously, he scanned through the Tardis data core and found the file he was looking for. "Bad," The Doctor stated, "in fact, make that very bad." After a short pause he added, "unless you plan on meeting yourself and rewriting time.

The Doctor put his game face on, a face reserved for chess. He ran down through the endless corridors towards the centre of the Tardis and the broken generator.

After a quick run down deeper into the ship, he found himself in front of a massively massive Ultra-XL Eon Particle Generator. Looking like a technophobe he kicked the lumpy piece of tech. It didn't do anything. He kicked it again. Again it did nothing. Frustrated, he got out his Sonic Screw-Driver, which, at the push of a button made a lovable buzzing sound but although the buzzing was cool, it didn't help.

Using his supreme alien intellect he activated the ancillary computer and after some annoying warnings he clicked diagnose problems and read the report. "No… not, no!" The time-lord screamed in frustration as the computer showed that there was a piece of broken wire somewhere on the ship.

Using his handy not-so-sonic screw driver he opened the fuse box and let out a sigh of relief, it was only the electron-dongle duplicator fuse. Luckily he keeps one in his bath-room cabinet because it's really useful as a tooth-pick.

After he had replaced the electron-dongle duplicator fuse he went back to the now peaceful console and set the Tardis to fly to New New New New New New New New New New New New New New New York and sat on his chair and started to think, what had blown the fuse? Was it the sonic-lawn mower he had built last night or was it the disco he had had this morning? Either way, it was now over and so he found his news-paper and returned to drawing a moustache on the president.


End file.
